Cilantro delicately in bloom. Many herbs (basil, for example, and mint) turn bitter once they flower (so you always want to be pinching off the top leaves to use, to keep it from reaching that stage), but cilantro, fortunately, seems to taste pretty much the same at every stage of its life cycle. I'll let this go to seed and, I hope, reseed itself in that container. I do have more cilantro seed, however, so one way or another I hope to keep it going all summer.
Today's agenda: same old, but I'm happy to do it. Yesterday's laundry is still on the line, finishing its drying. Today is cooler, only 80F, and I think maybe a little less humid, which is good news. At some point I will have to take those things in, but I want them to be bone-dry before I do.
My Sofia dress, which I put up for sale yesterday, has sold! The price was right --- I just asked what I had paid for it and didn't offer discounted shipping, so my own costs in buying it will be (more or less, minus the Poshmark fee) covered. Part of me is sorry to see this dress go, but mostly I'm sorry that it didn't work for me. I so wanted it to. But if I'd kept it, I'd have been forcing myself to feel that it looked better than it did. I have dresses in my closet that fit me better and in which I feel fully confident, and those dresses are what I need to be wearing, not the one that doesn't fit me that well or make me feel confident. Nice try, but you have to know when to play catch-and-release.
So now I've got that dress on the line in the sun, finishing drying, so that I can pack and ship it later today. I will smell it carefully --- there is NO WAY it's going to arrive at its destination with a "terrible smell" acquired here (if that's a mystifying reference, read yesterday's post).
Otherwise . . . the dog and I will take what I hope is a nice little morning walk in which we don't encounter anybody head-on --- she barked at a guy on the street yesterday evening, because I stupidly though we could get past him instead of retreating to the vacant lot until he went by. Life with Dora . . . she means no harm, of course, and is only trying to head off what she perceives as potential harm coming her way, but it does get old sometimes. On the other hand, as long as we stay in our hermetically sealed bubble where she is the only dog in the entire universe, and I am the only person, then we are perfectly happy. In that bubble she is an exemplary dog (as the only dog in the universe would be, don't you know).
Unless I hear otherwise, tonight is pub night. The husband can reward himself for heroic work in the yard --- mowing back all the massive growth, weed-whacking all the edges to make things tidy again. I can reward myself for weeding and thinking about essay-writing but not actually doing any (although that could change in the course of the day). Mostly we can celebrate being home again to stay. As lovely as it was to see the progeny three weekends in a row, it is nice to settle again and resume the quiet tenor of our real life.
Wearing today (silly pose alert):
*Wool& Fiona dress (M) in Teal, bought November 2022, last worn May 10. Wears in 2025: 6? I think?
*Thrifted Crocs sandals, year 2 of wear
Blue earrings:
And again . . . let me praise this dress. Why does it feel good to me, when the Sofia did not? Well, for one thing, it's a size larger, and in this style, anyway, that seems to work. But for another, the softer, narrower elastic waistband, the fuller skirt, and the blousier bodice just seem more graceful to me, and move with me the way my body moves (hence the goofy poses above). The scoop neckline is graceful as well, though I do like dresses with a higher tank neck, such as my Sierra. There's just a lot more flow and fluidity to this dress, and I like that better. Also, the color is glorious. Wool& has phased out this teal, and I'm sorry that they have. It's such a delicious shade, not too bright but plenty saturated. Nearly six weeks into Eastertide, with the Ascension in sight (a week from today!), I am still reveling in wearing colors that aren't purple. Not that I'm not wearing purple, but I am really enjoying not having to wear purple.
This, again, is the dress I was wearing to walk the dog on the greenway one day, when a total stranger passed me and said, "That is a GORGEOUS dress."
And again, if they brought this style back in more colors, I would buy at least one more. At some point this dress is going to wear out, and I'm going to wish I had more in this style. I'm glad I snagged a Marine Blue one while I could --- I almost wore that dress today, but Teal called my name a little louder.
Breakfast shake today, made in the NutriBullet:
*about 2 c frozen blueberries (roughly 2/3 of a NutriBullet cup)
*about 1 oz neufchatel cream cheese
*1 very soft avocado (I had to eat it somehow before it went bad)
*2 heaping scoops raw-milk whey protein powder
*enough water to just about cover the blueberries, so that the whole thing would blend easily
I am drinking it now, and it's surprisingly good. The avocado is pretty much masked by the blueberries. I could have added some honey or something, and that would have masked it further, but I was hoping that it would just add extra creaminess, and it does, without an overt flavor of avocado. Your taste buds, and therefore your mileage, may vary, but this tastes fine to me.
I have been reading how women in general, but especially women over 50, are not eating enough protein to maintain muscle mass as we age. Loss of muscle mass can begin in your 30s and only accelerates as you enter perimenopause and beyond --- but that's not inevitable. It IS important to maintain and build muscle, because it's your best insurance against bone loss and osteoporosis, as well as your insurance against a heightened risk of injury. If your core is strong, you're far less likely to hurt your back and be plagued and incapacitated by pain. If you are in a weight-loss mode, muscle mass is what keeps you from gaining fat again once you shift out of active weight loss and into maintenance. More muscle=more metabolism.
So, part of maintaining and gaining muscle mass is lifting weights, as well as being active generally. The older-women bodybuilders I follow on Instagram (and no, I don't want to be a bodybuilder --- I just want to be strong and healthy) recommend walking 30 minutes a day, because walking increases your body's calorie-burning baseline, its capacity to burn up the fuel you give it even when you're not actively exercising, as well as your own happiness quotient. People tend to feel better when they get outside and move. These women also recommend "lifting heavy" --- for you, whatever your capacity is --- anywhere from 3-5 times a week*. I will admit that I don't do this in any schematic way, although I do walk multiple times daily AND I do something with weights that offer me some resistance most days. I just don't lift THAT heavy, and I probably don't do it for long enough at a time. My theory is that something is better than nothing.
*ETA: This woman, rightly I think, emphasizes that you have to consider your joints when you lift. Her thing is that you push the muscle to exhaustion --- like the point where you can't lift the weight another time --- and that how heavy the weight is matters less than that you do that.
They also say that to build muscle, or simply not to lose muscle as you lose fat, you need 1 gram of protein per pound of your GOAL BODY WEIGHT. That . . . seems like a lot of protein. Thank goodness for whey protein powder (this is what I use, and no, this is not an affiliate link). But I think it's probably important to shoot for. You don't want to lose muscle mass. And you want to maintain what you have and build it, even if you're not a bodybuilder. I don't want or need to look like this lady, and I don't share her particular goals, but I think the thrust of her advice is useful for the ordinary person who just doesn't want to fall apart.
Anyway, I have deadlifted a 25-lb kettlebell . . . a few times . . . this morning. And I've done some rowing reps with two 10-lb dumbbells. I will probably do more as the day goes on. AND I'll be walking. But I have also loaded myself up with protein this morning, in a fairly easy form, to keep me going through the day. I'm also glad I added the avocado, because aside from not wasting it, I have now consumed healthy fat, fiber, and nutrients including Vitamins C, E, and K, plus copper, folate, potassium, and magnesium, as well as the nutrients from the blueberries. I could have left out the neufchatel, because that doesn't add much nutrition, but it does enhance the flavor, especially as the main liquid in my smoothie was water (so, some extra hydration to offset the coffee I have also drunk this morning).
Welcome to my healthy day. Possibly this has been an insufferably healthy day already. But this kind of thing is on my mind. I can't spend time with . . . various elderly relatives . . . without thinking about my own future. There is much I won't be able to control. In the day that things move absolutely out of my power to control them, I will simply have to say fiat voluntas tua. But as long as I can control something, such as my own health, strength, and capacity to keep living my life in a way that I recognize, then that's what I'm going to do. My life is a gift --- every day is a gift --- and this is my stewardship of that gift.
And you thought I was just going to walk the dog.
AFTERNOON UPDATE
I have
*walked the dog (twice)
*walked to the post office to put my Sofia parcel in the mail
*written most of my Thomas Campion essay
*vacuumed the house
*perplexed the husband by responding, "I ratify that amendment," to his proposal that we go to the pub
*I did also heft some weights a little bit, but I forget whether I did that before I wrote the first part of this blog post, or after
For the remainder of the afternoon, I believe I shall
*sit on the porch with the dog and read Mapp and Lucia and maybe do a crossword puzzle
*rinse myself off a little before we go out. I will probably wear this same dress, but I feel just a tad sweaty after my walk to the post office, and in need --- eventually --- of a tiny refresh. (ETA: On second thought, it's kind of swampy out now, and I'm feeling hot, so I really might change to go out. STAY TUNED)