EASTER 6/MAY 30X 30 CHALLENGE, WEEK 2

 


Wood iris, speedwell, and looks like an obedient-plant leaf. 


SUNDAY/MAY 9/DAY 9

The last real Sunday in Eastertide, before we roll forward into what poet and memoirist Kathleen Norris calls "the long goodbye" of the Ascension, followed by the long hello of Pentecost. 

And we're rolling into Week 2 of the May 30x30 style challenge. Here again is my menu of wardrobe options for May, with notes/eliminations/substitutions as I move through the week: 

Dresses:

1. Navy knit sheath dress

2. Navy fit-and-flare dress

3. Washed navy/indigo swing t-shirt dress

4. Blue-gray smocked above-the-knee tiered jumper (? not sure I'll keep)

5. Blue/light indigo J.Jill shapeless midi dress

6. Bleach-dyed blue v-neck dress

7. Wild card 

Skirts: 

1. Blue/multi gauze maxi skirt

2. sage green twill skirt

3. Wild card

Pants/shorts/jumpsuit:

1. Sage green shorts

2. sage-green drawstring pants

3. Duck-egg blue crop jeans  Urban Outfitters pants, a big MAYBE  Nah. I could use another cycled-in pair of pants – although the weather's about to warm up significantly. Possibly my sage-green skinnies, for more green in the list?

4. Rose-brown jumpsuit

5. Wild card  navy paper-bag waist French terry relaxed pants

6. Slate-blue twill shorts

Tops: 

1. sleeveless white pintuck

2. white half-tee

3. collarless medium denim

4. light chambray button shirt

5. army green tee

6. pale blue tank   navy-white patterned Liz Claiborne tank

7. pink lace-hem tank

8. navy scoop-neck embroidered tee

9. J.Jill blue tie-dye swing tee

10. Wild card  (eliminated this slot here, added a pair of shorts under "pants")

Cardigans/jackets/top layers:

1. Blue duster-length

2. Green boyfriend cardigan

3. Blue flowered kimono

4. Jean jacket

5. Wild card   Light-blue shrug cardigan

Today for Mass I'm wearing: 

#2 dress (Talbots, thrifted)

#2 cardigan (Loft, thrifted)

fisherman's sandal wedges (Old Navy, thrifted).  

It would be interesting to put together an outfit consisting entirely of the same number – this is coincidental, but I wonder how it would really work. 









Bare face, half-updo Day 2 hair in a claw clip. Gold drop earrings (not that visible, sorry) made for me by my elder daughter at age 12 or 13, in honor of Mother's Day. Hair still a little damp from refreshing with a spray bottle of water. 



If we weren't wearing masks, I'd honestly put on some lip color, just to wake myself up . 

I didn't think two seconds about this outfit, just grabbed it and put it on. I like that in an outfit: that I can grab it and put it on, and it actually looks fine, as I think this one does. That after all is supposed to be the appeal of a capsule wardrobe, though so many capsule wardrobes are so limited that you really do end up wearing the same outfit all the time, which gets boring. Also, as I've said before, so many capsule wardrobes turn on neutrals and black, and even if you look good in black (I do not), that too would be bound to get boring after a while. As I've said before, I've been trying to winnow and reconfigure my existing wardrobe (getting rid of things, adding new things only very judiciously) so that without being too tiny, it functions like a capsule. The May 30x30 is a great challenge in that it invites you to work with a larger but not infinite number of pieces to do just that. 

So I knew without having to think about it that the green cardi would play just fine with the navy dress. I like that I have going on, subtly, the formula of light-dark-color-pattern: the dress is dark, obviously, while the cardigan is both lighter and faintly patterned. Light shoes, too, which also add some low-key pattern as well as contrast with the dress. I'm not a high-contrast person, and I tend to shy away from pattern, unless it's small and floral. But textures, as in the weave of a sweater or a leather shoe: perfect level of interest, as far as I'm concerned. 

This dress was an excellent $6 Goodwill find. I've worn it to funerals; I could wear it to weddings; I wore it out to dinner on my birthday. It doesn't dress totally down, but it's comfortable, and I've worn it with my Crocs thongs and a waist-knotted cardigan for a more casual look. I wore it this past Friday, in fact, with tan fake Birks and a denim jacket. I always feel good in it. Though I'm not all that slender right now, and I definitely don't have flat abs, the cut of the dress flatters the body I do have, even without the light vertical line of the boyfriend cardigan. And I love the swirl of the skirt. 

This is easily the least hippy-dippy/granola dress I own – nothing says Republican Women's Prayer Breakfast quite like the Talbots label, especially in navy – but I don't feel too conservative or constrained in it. I don't feel I'm wearing some kind of costume or uncomfortable persona. I just feel polished, together, and attractive, without calling massive attention to myself, even if I have just taken a bunch of selfies. 

Off to Mass now. Later I will probably exchange the wedges I'm wearing now for either my Crocs thongs or my tan fake Birks, to dress down for the afternoon without turning into a complete schlub. 

NOTE AT THE END OF THE DAY: 

I will probably be making some substitutions to my 30x30 master list this week. I think I'm going to take off the #6 top, that pale-blue tank, which I wore yesterday. Like many of my favorite tops, it's starting to develop some holes, and they're more noticeable than not. I might cut it off some and keep it as a half-tee layering piece, because I love the neckline detail, but I don't think it's going to work as a staple top. Sadly, sadly. I haven't quite decided what to repace it with. I have a navy tie-dye tee that could be a contender – that's what I wound up wearing out last night with the rest of my Saturday ensemble (go here and scroll down to the bottom). Still kind of assessing my current array of shirts, virtually all of which are thrifted and many of which I've worn hard, so that they are starting to spring little leaks and otherwise look past their sell-by. I keep thinking I'm going to have a no-buy season, but then reality looks me right in the face. 

I did buy, on Ebay, some paper-bag-waist Urban Outfitters blue pants. They look duck-egg-blue on my screen, rather like the cropped jeans I wore yesterday, but we'll see what shade they actually turn out to be. They're cotton and look fairly lightweight, so I should be able to get some summer wear out of them. I may slot them into the wild-card place on my pants list, depending on how well they fit and how much I like them once they get here (I hope the answers to these questions are going to be just fine and a lot). If these work, I'd like to get some more, especially if my skinny jeans are all going to turn out not to fit come the fall. I hope that won't be the case – I like my skinny jeans – but one never knows. 

Meanwhile, it's been a lovely Mothers' Day. I spent most of it gardening – pulling weeds, pruning back overgrown forsythias and laurels, transplanting some forsythia "babies" into the front-lawn hedge that separates the house from the street. Gifts from my children, a nice dinner, caramel brownies made by my daughter, phone calls from distant offspring. I'm grateful for these good people in my life, who are always and everywhere a gift. 

MONDAY/MAY 10/DAY 10

Damp, soft, overcast weather this morning, though the high is supposed to reach nearly 80F. 

Today's 30x30 outfit, pretty much thrown on: 

#5 light-indigo J.Jill shapeless dress (bought on clearance 3-4 years ago)

#2 white half-tee (cheap Walmart tee, cut off)

#4 jean jacket (thrifted), because the damp makes things feel chillier than they are. 

Thrifted Birkenstock Floridas. 

Here's the outfit without the jacket: 



And with. 



I slept last night with my hair twisted up in a scrunchie bun. This morning I just twisted it up again without even brushing it, and here it is. 



On the docket for today: 

*catch up on laundry

*begin anthology essay

*run eye over novel draft

*contact poets whose Zoom reading I'm hosting May 19 (yes, you can register)

*moderate online homeschool group

Not bad innings, really. And it's only 4 pm, and I have dinner on, so there is time to run an eye over the novel draft again. I also went out and did some weeding. 

**Another Ebay purchase today: a second pair of paper-bag-waist pants, this time in navy French terry. I can see getting a lot of wear, potentially, out of these pants, assuming they fit the way I hope they will. I must stop this Ebay nonsense, though. It starts to add up. 

The dress I'm wearing today is truly the world's most comfortable item of clothing. It's a fairly heavy jersey knit, indigo-dyed like a pair of jeans, so it's faded significantly in the several years I've had it. I like the curved hem, which gives it a sort of Japanese-fashion look, even though it's cotton knit, not linen. It's shapeless, but the lines manage to be graceful. And it's certainly a dress that forgives weight fluctuations. It's nice on its own, but I also like it as a jumper over a tee. With the Birks I've got some light-dark-color-pattern going on: the white tee, the blue of the dress for color, the shoes providing both a dark contrast and, in the triple straps, a repeated pattern against my skin. This is the simplest of outfits, but I like that even so, it's got a little subtle interest going on. 

TUESDAY/MAY 11/DAY 11

I went to bed last night thinking that yesterday had been Tuesday, and that today was Wednesday, and it still feels that way in my mind, but whatever. Nice to have an extra day to finish (I hope) the essay I began yesterday, and to begin researching the next one. 

This morning so far, I have drunk coffee, taken a 2-mile walk with my husband, and surfed around the internet preparatory to a day's work. In addition to writing, I have a homeschooling consult at 3, for which I've mapped out two hours, so it will be a busy day. 

What I'm wearing: 

#2 sage-green drawstring pants (Target, very old, as in roughly 15 years)

#9 blue tie-dye swing tee (J.Jill, thrifted)

#4 jean jacket (Loft, thrifted)

Crocs "Sexi" thong sandals (bought new 3 years ago)

Braided Day 4 hair with small scrunchie

Unretouched photos from after our morning walk: 





The lines here are maybe kind of boxy, and of course I'm not thin, but I don't care. I like the colors and the relaxed feel of this outfit. Truly my love for these sage-green drawstring pants is boundless, and I was sad to find another tiny hole that's sprung along the crotch seam. I fear their days are numbered. As I may have remarked before, I started this year thinking how virtuous it would be to have a no-buy year, but what I am discovering is that everything I most love is wearing out and needs replacing. If I'm going to have a virtuous no-buy year, then I need to get myself in a position where such a thing is feasible and sustainable. In the meantime, I'm committing myself to not buying new, but thrifting and Ebaying. This I think is the way to a sustainable wardrobe that ultimately won't need much added to it for a long time. That, and taking lots of walks so that I don't entirely outgrow the pants I have that aren't wearing out . . . 

Unretouched post-walk no-makeup face and hair: 



These are my favorite thrifted earrings. My husband was a little horrified to learn that I buy earrings at thrift stores, but baby, that is what rubbing alcohol is FOR. I also love my little indigo/navy-print scrunchie, which I did not buy at a thrift store, but in your regular old CVS pharmacy last Saturday, when we were in Charlotte for my second Covid vaccine. 

Anyway, kind of windblown, and my bangs have reached that difficult stage, but I think I'm going to keep growing them out for now. They have a long way to go before they count as actually-grown-out, and I'm curious to know what a longer bang will be like. 

Today's agenda: 

*work on Tracy K. Smith essay

*work on novel

*homeschooling consultation in the afternoon

*receive daughter's bass amp being delivered today

*children out for dinner/dinner for two with candlelight

*laundry (because when is there not?)

WEDNESDAY/MAY 12/DAY 12

In the news: gas shortages and price hikes. Both kids went out last night with cars and were able to fill them, so at least we're not running on fumes and can conserve from here on out. It will be interesting to see what the grocery shelves start to look like – I'm glad we still haven't finished the canned salmon I bought at the end of Lent, or the tuna. Got a fair amount of meat in the freezer, and I bought a lot of eggs last week (plus we can hit local farms, as really we should be doing anyway). 

Meanwhile, we have to go out and get our new car tagged: the new-to-us car that I drove back from my mother's a couple of weeks ago. I hate this kind of administrative thing. It gives me active anxiety. But it'll be fine, and my husband, kindly enough, because he really doesn't have to, is accompanying me for moral support. Get you a man who'll stand in the tag-office line with you when his name isn't on the title. That's what. 

Drinking coffee at the moment and mulling what to put on for this errand, since it is out in public and everything. The weather's rainy and looks like continuing that way, with a current temperature of 48F (bleah) and a projected high of 61F. NOT my favorite weather. Pas du tout. I think I'll be adding some wild-card warmer layers today – maybe the rose-pink joggers, to wear with the #3 collarless medium denim shirt, and my gray puffer jacket, a gift from my older daughter for Christmas 2019. It's that kind of day. Glad I wasn't saving all my gardening to do today. 

I won't have time to get my hair washed and dried before we have to go stand in line, so I'll either do it later today, or tonight, or possibly just wait till Friday and wash it for the weekend. That's the only thing about having long hair, and a lot of it, even with layers cut in. Until recently I'd just have washed it and gone out with it wet – in my mid-20s, I horrified my mother by going wedding-dress shopping with wet hair – but I feel less and less inclined to do that anymore. For one thing, it feels clammy. And for another, even not-very-clean hair worn up seems to look better than immaculately clean hair straggling wet down your back like medusa locks, and I feel the difference these things make, in a way that I never did when I was young and carefree (say, in my late 40s). I don't make much of an effort, but I can make that much. 




LATER: What I actually wound up wearing out of the house (because goodness, the weather is disgusting): 



This would have looked classier if I'd worn a scarf, but I didn't think about it until I was already out of the house. Anyway, all we did was stand in line at the tag office – successfully, I might add. In one trip and one trip only, we managed to provide all requisite documents and come away with a transferred title, a new license plate, and tags. TRIUMPH. 

Here too is the bass amp that appeared on our front porch yesterday afternoon. At least, here's the box it was in: 



It's not quite that big, but it's pretty darn big. 

Putting off diving into my essay, which is proceeding at a rate of roughly one long, convoluted sentence roughly every day and a half. Maybe I'll go wash my hair instead. Everybody thinks better in the bathtub, right? That's what I thought. 

THURSDAY/MAY 13/DAY 13

Sunny with a high of 70F. 

Today's outfit: blue on blue. 

#3 duck-egg-blue crop jeans (Simply Vera Wang, thrifted)

#4 light chambray button shirt (don't know the label, thrifted)

Birk Floridas (thrifted)

Hair that I washed yesterday afternoon, and that dried right about the time I went to bed. Damp refreshed (spray bottle of water, misted and scrunched a bit) today. 






I like layering the same color, so that it becomes more or less a neutral. I hadn't really thought about this shirt with these pants before, but the low-contrast effect feels good. My only major complaint about these pants is that they're mid-rise, when I wish they were high-rise, but the drapiness of the shirt helps with that. The line that the knotted shirt hem creates downplays the hippiness (as in pear-shaped body, not as in granola) that these pants otherwise tend to accentuate, too. So that's decent. The shoes provide both a dark "frame" and some pattern. For yet another work-at-home day, I feel presentable and as if I'd put some thought into my outfit, even though I basically just pulled the pieces out and put them on. 

On the other hand . . . these pants could be a little less tight through the crotch, as I'm noticing in the photos above. Not awful, but am I comfortable with the way they ride up just there? Not sure. 

Oh, but THEN! 

As soon as I'd gotten dressed, I went out to fetch the mail, and what should have appeared on my doorstep, but one of the pairs of pants I'd bought on Ebay? 

These are AnyBody Women's French terry paper-bag-waist pants. I thought I was buying secondhand, but they seem new. In any event, they're GREAT. 







Having tried them on, I'm now not taking them off. They're soft and comfortable, with a high rise (what was I just complaining about?) and relaxed fit which feels very flattering. It doesn't show up well in the middle photo, but the waist is elasticized with a separate tie belt. I rolled up the bottoms about three turns, and we'll see how well they stay rolled, but so far so good. 

These really seem like pants that could dress up or down as the occasion demanded. It will be interesting to see how well they hold their shape, and how durable and lasting they are overall. The fabric is fairly lightweight, and I could see its not having a lot of endurance value. But I could be wrong about that. 

They have pockets, but those pockets are so much less bulky than my two  similarly-cut (but not so high-rise) pairs of joggers. 

The material is light enough for summer, but I think I should get year-round wear out of them. 

And they don't ride up in the crotch. 

I'm going to cycle these into my 30x30 – I'll remove the wild-card slot from my bottoms list and just count these pants instead. 

Still waiting for the lighter-blue Urban Outfitters pants I also bought on Ebay. Those I know are "pre-owned." On my screen they looked very much the same color as the crop jeans above, but we'll see. If they fit as I hope they will, I will also add them to the 30x30 – possibly I'll remove the crop jeans, or else eliminate another wild-card slot from another part of the 30x30 capsule. 

It could be that I'll wind up outboxing the crop jeans . . . I like them all right, and I love the color, but they're not really as flattering as I would have hoped, and I'm not sure I'd have bought them if I'd been able to try them on beforehand. They're okay, and if I don't do any better, I will keep them and wear them, but if I wind up with something in the same color that improves on the fit and shape, then I won't mind parting with them. 

Update:  The more I look at the first set of pictures, with the crop jeans, the more I think I just should outbox them. So I have. They'll be there for a while, and if I truly miss them I can reclaim them. But yeah. If I'd been able to try them on, quite possibly I would not have bought them, even though I love the color. 

It's my huge hope that the Urban Outfitters pants I've ordered from Ebay will be close to the same color as the crop jeans, in which case I could do the same blue-on-blue layering. I like that combo a lot, and would love to have a pair of pants I like better, that fit better – not to mention a skirt, shorts, anything else in that duck-egg-blue – with which to create that kind of color scheme. 

Another note: 

I've been comparing my various navy tops to the shade of these new pants (hard to find an exact match) in the hopes of being able to create a faux jumpsuit look as one of my long-term options. I have one v-neck tee that's close, but I think next time I go thrifting I'll wear these pants and see if I can't match them even more closely. It would be especially nice to find some kind of loose, vaguely dressy tank for such a combination. 

LATE AFTERNOON UPDATE

My daughter and I walked to the thrift shop down the street to check things out. She got a 75-cent "Grow Your Own Boyfriend" (Safe and Non-Toxic!), which made us both laugh a lot, and I got these slate-blue/washed-navy shorts: 



No label, but they're a size 12, which I hope will fit. Shorts sizing seems to be even more all-over-the-map than regular pants sizing. I have some size 12 shorts that are on the loose side, and some size 12 shorts that are on the edge of being too tight. This even though I wear size 8-10 in normal trousers. I was wanting some blue shorts, and the color of these is just what I like: a grayed navy-ish blue. They're pretty heavyweight and seem as though they'd be good for hiking, as well as for nicer shorts-wearing occasions. 

How they look on: 



They're much higher-rise than I thought they'd be, which is great news. They also fit more or less perfectly. I wish they were just a hair longer, because I think they'd be more flattering if they hit slightly lower on my leg, but they're not too short for comfort. 





All in all, NOT a bad $2 expenditure. I will cycle them into my 30x30 by eliminating another wild-card slot, possibly under "tops," where I really think I have enough choices. 

I didn't keep on these shorts after photographing them – it was back to the navy paper-bag-waist pants, which I'm going to be tempted to live in. One good thing about challenges like this, as I might have said before, is that they keep me from just wearing the same thing that I like over and over until it falls apart. 

I probably wouldn't wear what I'm wearing above – chambray shirt and shorts – as an outfit, just like that. The shirt's a little voluminous, as is my hair. I might wear a tee or tank with the shirt unbuttoned over it as a sun-screening layer. I might wear a more feminine top to balance the utilitarian feel of the shorts. I might wear my hair up instead of down. Any number of tweaks could happen, and very likely will, now that I've written it down to remind myself. 

Also rescued from the same thrift shop, for 50 cents – fitty cent, as people say here – on the Feast of Our Lady of Fatima: 



This is, in fact, an image of Our Lady of Grace, not Our Lady of Fatima, but whatever her dress looks like, whatever she's doing with her hands, she's the same Lady every time, and I was glad to find her. 

FRIDAY/MAY 14/DAY 14

What? The end of the week already? And I'm still straining out this one stupid essay? It's too many words, yet not concluded. Trying to tie it off somehow is my #1 goal for the day. 

Reviewing my 30x30 list at the almost-halfway mark (no way, how are we already one day shy of halfway-through-May??), here are some random thoughts: 

*I don't know how I'm actually going to wear all these things. It feels like too much

*As much as I like dresses, it feels like too many dresses. 

*My J.Jill indigo shapeless dress is starting to spring some holes. This is probably, sadly but realistically, its last season. On the other hand, if I'm feeling that I have a lot of blue dresses, maybe this isn't all that sad. Maybe it's more like a realistic decision being made for me. 

*It's been colder than I had anticipated, especially this week, which is maybe why it feels like too many warm-weather dresses and not enough pants or warmer layers. BUT that could change a lot after the halfway point in the month. 

*I am really happy with blue and sage green as foundational colors. More and more I want my whole wardrobe to turn on those colors, with some pink. I am actually looking forward to cycling a few more pink items back in once this challenge ends – and also my two gray short dresses. I don't miss them nearly as much as I was afraid I would, but they do work for me as a neutral. 

*I can afford to outbox things that really don't work for me, even if one thing about them (like the color) does work. I don't mean this in the sense of "I am made of money and can discard and buy new clothing at will." I mean that judiciously I can cull items and still have plenty to wear – and in fact my wardrobe will work better for me, not worse, if I do identify and cull those items, even if I don't find a replacement for them. 

*I don't need to hang on to experiments that turn out to be dodgy (I'm looking at you, tiered Target-juniors-department-circa-mid-2000s dress . . .). Experiments are fun, but unless the results really wow me, keeping the experiment in the closet is a contribution to my own decision fatigue. It's a recipe for saying, over and over, "Well, it didn't really work last time, but maybe this time . . ." – and being wrong about that, again, 

*I can commit myself to never again buying pants that aren't high-rise (and to praying, on behalf of all of us, that low-rise pants never come back in again), because I can see how much more flattering high-rise waists are for me. 

*I have some shirts in my outbox that haven't been working with the lower-rise/skinny jeans/trousers that have dominated my pants wardrobe, but which I think will work with the higher-rise, looser-fit trousers I'm gradually starting to acquire. I think I'll take them out of the outbox and hang them back in the closet, just to see if I'm right, once the 30x30 challenge is over. 

*After the end of this challenge, I'll be re-evaluating everything else in the closet in terms of the pieces I chose for this challenge – what pieces really emerge as core pieces, what else works with them that I won't have worn for a month? What have I missed wearing and thought about wearing, and what have I not missed at all? 

*One reason I want my whole wardrobe to dovetail with blue – blue as the foundation for EVERYTHING – is that I don't want to have more than one purse. I have executive-function struggles. I can't cope with moving all my life from purse to purse. My one currently active purse hangs on its peg by the back door, with my keys. That purse holds things like my wallet, most of my lip balms,  my masks (though I look forward to not having to have masks always on hand), and my rosary. I admire all these people who have a bag for every outfit, but hoo boy. That's not me. At the moment I have a navy canvas purse in a nice size (it will also hold my Kindle Paperwhite easily, and my phone), whose front panel is a lighter blue and gold vaguely Indian print. I bought it at Goodwill, mostly for its size and because I didn't hate it. It does go reasonably well with most outfits. The last purse I had (which still hangs on my closet door) was silver, and I liked it, but it's too small for everything I want to carry with me. I could still use it for dressier occasions if I absolutely had to, but not for everyday. I don't want a big bag, because then things get lost in the bottom. I want my purse to hold, compactly, my wallet, phone, Kindle, and possibly my spare glasses, with pocket space for lip balms and rosary. I want none of those things to sink to the bottom and become so much silt for me to dig through. I just want the ONE go-everywhere purse that will accomplish these things for me so that I don't have to think about it all every time I have to leave the house. (someday I'd love the basic equivalent of this purse in a fine natural leather . . . someday). 

Thinking these thoughts because I see people posing with their bags, like the bag is yet another outfit element they had to choose, and while I understand that this is the case, and that it makes a difference, I just cannot. 

So, today. At the moment it's still early, and I'm drinking coffee in my pajamas and waiting for the temperature to go up some. It's currently 48F, but the projected high is 72F. If I had to leave the house I'd be thinking layers – in fact, my 30x30 capsule would look very different I were going out to work every day, not least because I would be having to accommodate fluctuations in temperature in a lot more premeditated way. Instead, I can just opt not to get dressed until I'm good and ready and have seen how the day is going to go. 

I'm also holding out hope that my Urban Outfitters pants will come in today's mail, and that said mail will arrive closer to nine than to noon, but we shall see. 

While waiting for the mail to come, I've decided to experiment a bit, repeating yesterday's navy trousers with a thrifted Liz Claiborne sleeveless navy-print top I'd put in the outbox, because it totally doesn't work with skinny jeans. 

Here I was, trying it last fall with some trousers I've since donated: 



One of the things I didn't like about these trousers, though I did like many things about them, and wore them for about five years, was the relatively low rise. That meant that with a slimmer-fitting shirt, the muffin-top created by the rise of the pants became all the more noticeable, especially if I tried to tuck the shirt in. The print helps disguise some of that, but I really wasn't happy with the look. 

I tried the shirt – which I like because of the batik-ish print, and because it's sleeveless and good for summer – with various other items, mostly straight skirts or, again, skinny jeans, because that was what I had. Whether tucked or untucked, it just never came off as flattering. 

So I thought I'd try it tucked in with these more relaxed-fit high-waist pull-on pants I've just bought. I'm still not entirely convinced, but I think it's better this way. 



At the very least, the pants waist hits above the swell of my un-flat stomach. That helps. 



In this combination, everything's not happening right at my hips, but more at my natural waist. That's a plus. On the other hand, the whole thing as is feels maybe a little unbalanced – more volume at the bottom, because that's where my body just does have more volume. Even with my hair down and billowy, that's how the composition strikes me. 

Because it's still chilly, but also to create more volume on top, I added this wild-card cardigan: 




I was reading somewhere today about how suddenly all the long boyfriend or duster cardigans we've all been collecting don't work so well with the new wider-leg pants silhouette. I haven't tried out this theory on my own clothes, but I can see how smaller, shorter cardigans might come into play more in the coming season. I have this one, a Jones New York piece which I've owned since approximately 2004, and it goes with most of what I have, so I'm not necessarily going to go looking for more cardigans just now. We'll see where we are when fall rolls around. In the meantime, my longer cardigans work just fine with the dresses I have, with shorts, with my skinny jeans, which I imagine I'll still wear, assuming they fit me when next I take up with them . . . 

Anyway, I think I'll just keep this outfit on for now, even though it does repeat yesterday's pants, and ponder making this tank a part of my 30x30 (I guess switching things out is sort of cheating – I'm hazy about the rules here! On the other hand, if I keep a consistent 30 items to work with, and don't just add stuff when it suits me without taking something away . . . that works). If the Urban Outfitters pants do show up, then I'll try them with the shirt and see what I think. 

I have thought I might replace the worn pale-blue tank that was my original #6 top with this tank, though I might just leave that as a wild-card spot. 

In the meantime, I have to drag myself back to my poetry essay. Must. Finish. Writing. About. Tracy. K. Smith. 

LATER: 

The mail came. It did not include my Urban Outfitters pants. Wah, say I. Wah-like-a-little-baby wah wah wah. 

Apparently they're arriving tomorrow. 

Sent an offpsring away to a medieval cosplay/re-enactment event this weekend – his first-ever on-his-own road trip, as he noted. A man, a car, the open road, and a back seat full of armor. 

The other three of us are just hanging around, having black-bean-salsa-soup tonight, and I dunno, not being very medieval. 


SATURDAY/MAY 15/DAY 15: 

THE HALFWAY POINT

One offspring away at his cosplay thing. One offspring working this afternoon from 1-9. One husband at college graduation. One me at the kitchen table having last night's black-bean soup for breakfast and feeling my wet hair go drip-drip-drip down my back. 

I read something yesterday that – naive as I undoubtedly am – surprised me. The #ootd hashtag on Instagram, or "Outfit of the Day," features pictures of people wearing clothes that they apparently JUST put on for that picture, but did not actually wear that day. Also breaking: there is no Easter Bunny. 

I know, I know. I really am naive. There is much in the wide world that I don't understand. But I'll just come out and say it: who has time to get dressed, take pictures of themselves, and then get dressed in something else for their actual day – routinely? Why would your #ootd not actually BE, you know, the outfit you're going to wear that day? 

I understand things like changing clothes to work out (though I hate to), or putting on walking shoes, or getting grubby to work in the garden. Even so . . . those are clothes, too, aren't they? They're part of the outfit you wore that day. Why wouldn't they also be part of the image you curate for yourself, unless you really want some serious gap between image and reality? I guess some people DO want that gap, but I have a hard time understanding why. I suppose this is in the same league with my objection to wearing makeup, myself. I don't think makeup is immoral, mind you, or fundamentally dishonest. For some people, it's fun. It's an art form. There's nothing objectively wrong with any of that. But if I wear it, I feel like a fraud. I felt that way even when I was relatively young and lovely, too. I thought, what, my real face isn't good enough? 

Anyway, maybe this is one of the reasons why posting on Instagram stresses me out. It is about presenting a curated image, and I'm a little too scrupulous for that. I feel compelled to tell you what I actually wore and did and looked like – and it occurs to me now that maybe that's a drag. Maybe that's not what people want to look at and read about at all. Maybe that's why I haven't even bothered with any kind of statcounter on this blog, and have not once checked out what kind of traffic I might be getting. Maybe I just know that this is pure narcissistic self-indulgence, which I am enjoying while the rest of the world swans on its own merry way. 

But I am enjoying it. And I am being extremely what-you-see-is-what-you-get here. If I put on an outfit, it's what I'm wearing that day, unless I tell you otherwise. As you've undoubtedly seen this week if not before, I'm going to tell you every time I make a change to that outfit, or try something else on. 

I am interested in clothing as a kind of art form, but I'm interested in it as an art form for real life. If it's just a costume that I put on for a few minutes and then take off again, then what's the point? The point of having clothes is to wear them and look good in them – for the purpose of living your life as a dimensional human being, not a mannequin. 

STILL WAITING FOR THE URBAN OUTFITTERS PANTS. They're supposed to arrive today. Meanwhile, although it's still a little cool out, I'm trying a shorts outfit: 





Pardon the snaky still-wet hair. What we have here are: 

#8 navy embroidered scoop-neck tee (old, bought at Belk)

#1 sage-green shorts (thrifted)

#1 blue duster-length cardigan (fast fashion, bought in January)

thrifted Birk Floridas

I still feel kind of cold, even with the cardigan, though that might be as much a function of my wet hair as anything else. 

If I go out to do some gardening later, as I might very well do, I'll probably put on leggings and a tee, but unless I persist in being cold, or unless the Urban Outfitters pants show up in a timely manner, this is my outfit for the day. 

Thoughts: 

*I always love this top. I've never worn it without feeling good in it. 

*I always love this cardigan, though I haven't actually worn it much in the 30x30. I especially like the longer line with the shorts, which I rolled up an extra fold to ensure that the shorts and cardigan hemlines don't hit at the same place. 

*I haven't worn shorts much in the 30x30, which is one reason why I reached for these today. But I like that I can make a nice outfit with them – I would wear this to a party, even. I guess if I wanted to be really dressy, I could swap the Birks for my fisherman-sandal wedges, but it's hard to imagine a scenario where I'd actually do that. For most of the parties that we have gone to in the last decade, at least, this exact outfit would be entirely appropriate. But it's also fine for the grocery store, or just hanging around. 

Taking stock, again, at the 30x30 halfway mark, here's a list of what I haven't worn at all yet: 

*blue flowered silk kimono

*blue tee swing dress

*blue bleach-dyed dress (might opt for that for church tomorrow)

*army-green tee

*slate/washed-navy shorts (but I just bought those day before yesterday)

 Things I've worn that I don't think I'll wear again: 

*smocked tiered jumper/dress

*duck-egg-blue crop jeans

Favorite looks so far: 



I liked this combo a lot: comfortable and easy, nice color-blocking in colors I feel good in, nice balance of masculine and feminine elements. 



I loved this – funnily enough, another blue-and-sage-green combination, also featuring my jean jacket. Again, more than anything else, the color harmony felt just right, while the whole vibe was casual without being sloppy. 


I've liked both my Sunday looks so far. This skirt is one of the very few patterns I chose for my 30x30 – I need to remember to get it out to play again, maybe in a more casual everyday combination. I also note that I've worn this blue "wild-card" cardigan repeatedly. I'm just going to replace that cardigan/top-layer wild-card slot with this specific item. 

The second Sunday Mass look, featuring more green-on-blue: 



And I like today's outfit, yet another blue-green combination. Funny how many of my perceived winners from the last two weeks have been blue-on-green. Once the Urban Outfitters pants do come, and assuming they fit, I really want to try them with my army-green tee, just to reverse the pattern and see how I like it. 

I've had relatively few outfits that I thought really didn't turn out, but these are the best of the lot. All the least-good outfits have involved items I've decided to outbox, or at least remove from play: the pale-blue tank, the duck-egg-blue jeans, the smocked tiered dress that I'd love to have work, but I really don't think it does. I won't get rid of them for good for a long time yet, but moving them out of play helps me re-visualize things and not keep making the same mistake over and over, in the vain hope that this time it somehow miraculously will turn out not to be a mistake. That move effectively eliminates sources of decision fatigue from my closet – and importantly, sources of decision fatigue that represent not-very-good choices. 

My goal: fewer decisions, better choices. 

UPDATE: 

Well, the long-awaited Urban Outfitters pants have arrived. And . . . I dunno. 



I love the color, and I like the cut and high-waisted shape. The fit is almost fine, but they're tight in the waist. 



And here, whereas the noxious mid-rise pants make the standard middle-aged stomach spill out over the top, the slightly-too-tight waist of the otherwise terrific high-rise pants just pooches the same stomach in this not-entirely-flattering way. Of course, a blousier tucked top would go a long way toward balancing that out. I might wear a navy top with this shade of blue – darker than I'd expected, though that's all right – but I would wear a longer, flowier top and tuck it in the front to get some drape. 



I do really like the shape. And it could be that the tencil weave will have a little give. The fit through the legs is just fine. The length is fine. I suspect a large in these pants would swallow me alive. 

So . . . a little more of a strikeout than I would have liked, and I should have paid closer attention to actual measurements. I'll hang onto them a bit and just see.

If they don't work for me, I'll pass them along to my older daughter, who's taller than I am but slimmer through the gut. This color would work well for her, as would the cut. 

But I will live with them and see what I think. 

Starting to think I need to learn to sew, just so I can make elastic-waist wide-leg linen pants and be happy for the rest of my life. 

And so adieu. The beautiful Saturday beckons. 

FINAL EASTER 6 UPDATE: 

Night out at a brew pub in Elkin. It's warm now, but there's a projected low of 43F, so I thought shorts might not be the best choice. Switched them out for a wild card: my old thrifted Izod boot-cut jeans, for a more monochrome ensemble. 



It's a vibe. 



Happy weekend, all.